Since the start of ASI we’ve always suggested the first step to talking to your partner about BDSM is going over our BDSM checklist. It’s a great way to break the ice, introduce new ideas and begin an open discussion about your desires.
Our list is extensive and over the past 10 months it has grown quite a bit! We’ve put a lot of work into creating this list and if you ever have questions about some of the terms, you are welcome to contact us.
We decided to transfer our original checklist into a handy printable Word document and an easy to read PDF file. It is condensed down to 8 pages with two columns per page (to reduce pages used when printing). If you ever have a question about the list, you can always contact us.
Remember, our checklist will always be free. You’ll never be charged to download it, so feel free to download it now… or later!
Fan Question:”I’m in a new relationship with a man who loves to be dominated. I’ve always wanted to explore bdsm but never trusted any of my previous partners to do so. When I met the man I’m with now it felt like we were destined to be together. We had an instant connection and we trust each other completely. As far as dominating him I’m working on it my only thing is I’m not confident enough idk why because he always tells me everrytime we try something new that I’m doing very well but idk I can’t seem to convince myself lol. U have any pointers for a new girl ?? My biggest weakness is the talk, its like I blank out . He loves when I talk dirty, drives him crazy but sometimes I cant think of anything!!!”
Answer: It’s going to take some practice! WHAT you say depends on what turns him on.. so maybe just ask him what gets him going? Is there a certain phrase or word that gets him really excited? Then you could use that to your advantage.. use it make him orgasm faster than expected, to tease him, to deny him, etc. That all depends on what kind of D/s relationship you guys have. I think once you understand what words/phrases turn him on and which ones kill his sexual appetite, you’ll have more confidence in USING those words for your own fun!