Overcoming Shyness

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Fan Question: “I have a long question about shyness: My Master and I have been together in the past and he really had me out of my shell. I felt free to speak up when I wanted to play, say the sexual things that were on my mind etc. Then we split up and I ended up settling for a dom who hated that about me and made me feel like I was disgusting for it. Im back with my original Master but Im too shy to do the things I used to because Im super self concious about any of it now. He’s very loving and has endless patience (the first time we played again, it took me a half hour to wiggle out of my shirt and get over a mini anxiety attack) but I know it must be wearing out. The other night he said that he wouldnt initiate play until I was able to speak up first. How do/have you overcome your shyness?”

Answer: I think what your current Dom is really trying to do is trying to get you comfortable with who you are so that you feel comfortable around him! Don’t worry about impressing him, or about messing up, just be YOU and things will fall in place (even if it’s not where you thought it would). Believe me, we all go through a phase of trying to please the people around us.. and it wont’ get you very far. Once you realize you are a wonderful person, with personality and beauty, you will be able to accomplish so much in your life and your relationship!


Fan Question: “I have trouble submitting fully, as my cheeky personality comes through and makes people see me as a brat. Does anyone have advice for preventing this?”

Answer: My advice would be.. don’t stop being who you are! If you are a little bratty.. so be it… a lot of submissives have “bratty” qualities and this is something that a Dom will either find endearing.. or not. You shouldn’t change your personality to please someone.